The inability of people afflicted with OCD in dealing with uncertainty is well-documented. So we will not go into details about that here.
In this article, we will focus on ways to deal with uncertainty (perceived or real). However, before we get into that, let us get a few things out of the way.
(1) OCD requires 100% certainty. A very high-bar that cannot be attained by logical thinking or rationally analyzing past events.
(2) Most OCD people know the above but cannot stop their minds from constantly replaying events in their minds, checking / rechecking if something happened/did not happen etc. This is normal OCD. Most likely, you already know this too.
So, given the above, what is an OCD person to do?
ADJUST YOUR GOAL: Do not look for “peace of mind” (there is no such thing!). While going through a fierce episode of OCD, the goal should only be to remain functional through the given day despite OCD. In other words, to be reasonably productive despite obsessive thoughts and extreme urges for compulsions. Let this be your goal.
The “adjusted goal” above may seem quite attainable, but in practice it takes enormous amount of courage on the part of OCD person to focus on a task (however mundane) when the mind is holding one’s faculties hostage.
The internet is replete with well-intended articles about “accepting the fear”, “watching your thoughts and not identifying with them” etc, but when one is going through an OCD attack, the mind is sometimes too agitated for any kind of spiritual contemplation.
So what is one to do:
SIT WITH YOUR DISCOMFORT: If a formal meditation session (as recommended in this article) is impossible, one can do the following in order to rein in the mind enough to be able to perform day-to-day tasks (office work, run errands, do the laundry etc.).
(1) During the day, take frequent 5 minutes “Sit With My Discomfort” time-outs. This time-out can be taken anywhere (sitting in a car or at your desk, while standing in a long queue etc.)
(2) During a given 5-minutes time-out, pretend that whatever you have been fearing has happened. That you are indeed afflicted with a serious disease, or that you are really a rapist (if that is your fear).
(3) Now observe what the above thoughts do to you physically. Do a mental check of all the uncomfortable sensations that has risen in the body. There will be plenty of unpleasant sensations, some overwhelming – queasy gut, weak limbs, heavy breathing etc. You might even start sweating.
(4) This is the KEY step. If you have been to a Hatha Yoga class (or any kind of fitness class), you may recall that often times when you are doing a challenging asana/pose or routine, a part of you is eagerly waiting for the instructor’s cue to come out of the pose. But until that happens, you remain in the pose despite all the unpleasant sensations. LET THIS BE YOUR 5 MINUTES YOGA POSE. Tell yourself, no matter what happens, I am going to remain in this “martyr mental mode” (after all, your fears have come true!) for 5 minutes.
In the beginning, you will most likely not understand the purpose of the above exercise. But like any Yoga asana, the more times you do it, the better you get at it. And very soon the “surrendered mindset” will stay with you more and more as you go about your day.
IMPORTANT NOTE: Do not expect that the above exercise will get rid of your OCD or that it will settle your unresolved worries/fears or that there will be happiness ever after. The mind will fight back. Remember, there is no such thing as “peace of mind”. The above steps should, however, help you come to terms with your fear to the extent that you can get through the day performing your day to day duties.
When you get into the mindset of the victim (whose worst fear has been realized), OCD will loosen up a little (no point holding on, when you have already won) allowing you to focus on other tasks.
Your worst case scenario manifested, you can go about your day as a person afflicted with a severe disease or as a rapist. Interestingly, with this kind of mindset, you might (every now and then) entertain the pleasant possibility that you may not be any of those things. But don’t tell your OCD that!